Обед в 50-е годы (не анекдот, но интересный американский текст)
vashper
Subject : Dinner in the Fifties....

Pasta had not been invented. It was macaroni or spaghetti.
Curry was a surname.
Pizza? Sounds like a leaning tower somewhere.
Bananas and oranges only appeared at Christmas time.
All chips were plain.
Rice was a milk pudding, and never, ever part of our dinner.
A Big Mac was what we wore when it was raining.
Brown bread was something only poor people ate.
Oil was for lubricating, fat was for cooking.
Tea was made in a teapot using tea leaves and never green.
Cubed sugar was regarded as posh.
Chickens didn't have fingers in those days.
None of us had ever heard of yogurt.
Healthy food consisted of anything edible.
Cooking outside was called camping.
What is a taco?
Seaweed was not a recognized food.
'Kebab' was not even a word, never mind a food.
Sugar enjoyed a good press in those days, and was regarded as being white gold.
Prunes were medicinal.
Surprisingly muesli was readily available. It was called cattle feed.
Pineapples came in chunks in a tin; we had only ever seen a picture of a real one.
Water came out of the tap. If someone had suggested bottling it and charging more than gasoline for it they would have become a laughing stock.
The one thing that we never ever had on/at our table in the fifties...
was elbows, hats and cell phones!

Пасту еще не изобрели. Это макароны или спагетти.
Карри было просто фамилией.
Пицца? Это падающая башня где-то в Европе?
Бананы и апельсины появлялись только на Рождество.
Все чипсы были простыми.
Рис был в молочном пудинге, и никогда, никогда не был частью нашего ужина.
Биг Мак был то, что мы носили, когда шел дождь.
Черный хлеб был чем-то только для бедных.
Масло было для смазки, для приготовления пищи был жир .
Чай готовился в чайнике, используя чайные листья, и не зеленые.
Сахар в кубиках считался  роскошью.
У кур не было пальцев в те дни (имеются в виду наггетсы).
Никто из нас никогда не слышал о йогурте.
Здоровая пища состояла из чего-то съедобного.
Готовка на улице была под названием кемпинг.
Что это такое - шаурма?
Водоросли не считались едой.
"Кебаб" - не было даже такого слова, не говоря уже о еде.
Сахар пользовался хорошей прессой в те дни, и считался "белым золотом".
Чернослив были лекарственным средством.
Удивительно, но мюсли были легко доступны. Только они назывались "комбикормом".
Ананасы были - в банках кусочками; а целиком мы их видели только на картинках.
Вода текла из крана. Если бы кто-то предложил разливать ее и продавать больше, чем бензин - он стал бы посмешищем.
Но вот чего точно никогда не было на нашем столе в пятидесятых... так это локтей, шляп и сотовых телефонов!

The plane crashed
vashper
The plane crashed and landed on an uninhabited island. The only survivor was sitting under a palm tree, eating a bone, when he saw rescuers, frozen in terror in front of him and a pile of human bones behind him.
- I know you hate me for what I did. But I had to fight for my life! I had to survive alone on a desert island!
The commander of the rescue:
- Of course, I understand, for the life of man is capable of anything...
But, fucking plane fell out only yesterday!!!

Comments

- planes do not "fall out" Vashper, they crash.
But, funny...

V:Hopefully, this knowledge is not useful to me..
these words are not synonyms? We have as it is not accepted that the words in a literary text was repeated. "crash" is already in the title, so normally selected some synonyms.

- quote:
Originally posted by vashper:
Hopefully, this knowledge is not useful to me...
dancing
Damm funny!! I am going to use that line tomorrow in staff meeting.

- Close enough, Vashper. In writing, it is referred to as style. We each have our own unique style, especially you.
- True that one Brice! Big Grin I was just up in your neck of the woods fly fishing the Skagit and North Puget Sound for Pinks and Dolly Varden and the Kalama for Steelhead. Big Grin
- "Fall-out" is more related to a Saturday night in Texas, when you're done drinking in the local honky-tonk, and attempt to leave the premises.
"Crash" is the term used to explain what happened to you on the way home, whether you arrive home in one piece, or not.
"Crash" also refers to what you do if you are lucky enough to make it home in one piece. You will attempt to "crash" on the bed. If you attempt this in the dark, there is a 50-50 chance you will miss the bed.
In the off-chance you drove a car to the honky-tonk, but arrived home by plane, you've probably "crashed" somewhere along the way.
If you hear the words "fall-out" in a really stern voice, you probably joined the military at some point during the night, and somehow missed the command "fall-in", which would have occurred at some point earlier.
Based on my experience, best just to try to sleep it off, and hope you wake-up with someone you know.

- Geez guys, it should not be that difficult to interpret " plane fell out only yesterday!!!" to mean " plane fell out of the sky only yesterday!!! Keep them coming Vashper! Smiler

Жалко, если пропадёт
vashper
( You are about to view content that may only be appropriate for adults. )

Модераторы - лучшие друзья живжурналов
vashper
и прочих твиттеров.
Ну вот не хотел вести свой журнал. Но пару раз (да чего там, не пару) "попал". Отвечал в чужом журнале (блоге и т.д.), старался, искал  информацию - а пост и не появился. Может правила нарушил (кто ж их читает-то, правила), может ещё что. Душа модератора ведь потёмки. А жалко ведь сок мозга-то своего!
Так что буду здесь писать, если захочется. Об идеальном человеке, о будущем и о прошлом, о том, что я видел. О науке и религии, королях и капусте,  химии и жизни, знании и силе. А также про Пелевина и Стругацких, fat_yankey и dr_guillotin.
Ведь когда не рефлексируешь на других, а пишешь сам - выбираешь свободу.

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